Halloween brings the joy of costumes, festive decorations, and an air of mystery that many look forward to each year. Yet, for Survivors of domestic violence, Halloween can pose unique challenges, some of which are hidden in plain sight. While costumes and masks are all in fun for most, for those who have experienced trauma, the inability to read facial cues and expressions can trigger a sense of anxiety and unease.

Why Masks and Costumes Cause Anxiety for Survivors

Masks and costumes change the way we perceive and interact with others, creating an environment that obscures people’s faces and hides their expressions. For Survivors of domestic violence, these changes can feel unsettling, even dangerous. Survivors often rely on subtle cues to anticipate and manage the behavior of those around them. Having endured volatile or unpredictable situations, they may instinctively scan faces for signs of emotion, like anger, sadness, or aggression, as a means of self-preservation. When faces are covered, this vital information is obscured, causing unease and heightened anxiety.

Hypervigilance: A Constant State of Awareness

For many Survivors, hypervigilance—the state of remaining constantly on high alert—is a familiar part of everyday life, stemming from their traumatic experiences. They may find it difficult to relax, even during what should be low-stakes interactions. Halloween’s atmosphere of unpredictability, from people unexpectedly jumping out in costumes to faces hidden by masks, can disrupt their sense of safety. This heightened sense of alertness can feel isolating, as the holiday intended for enjoyment becomes a source of stress.

The Startle Reflex and Halloween’s Scares

Halloween is known for its spooky ambiance, with unexpected scares and surprises being all part of the fun for many. But for Survivors, the season’s jump scares and eerie environments can tap into painful memories, reactivating their startle reflex. A sudden fright might trigger flashbacks or intense physical responses. For those with PTSD, this feeling of fear and panic might persist well beyond the scare itself, creating a lasting impact.

How to Be Sensitive to Survivors During Halloween

If you know a Survivor of domestic violence, consider checking in to see how they feel about Halloween. Simple gestures like avoiding scary masks or costumes around them, refraining from unexpected jump scares, or even creating calm, predictable gatherings can go a long way in making them feel safe. Recognizing these potential anxieties can create an environment of understanding and respect for what they may be experiencing.

Self-Care Tips for Survivors During Halloween

For Survivors themselves, managing the challenges of Halloween begins with setting personal boundaries. Here are a few suggestions that may help:

• Plan Ahead: If attending an event or party, consider arriving early to acclimate yourself before the crowd arrives. Bring a friend who understands your concerns and can provide support if needed.
• Opt for Small Gatherings: Choosing smaller, familiar gatherings over large parties can provide a more predictable and comfortable environment.
• Have a Safety Plan: If you feel anxious or need a break, have a plan for taking some time alone or leaving the event. Knowing you have this option can provide a sense of control.
• Communicate Your Needs: It’s okay to let friends and family know that Halloween’s costumes and masks can be uncomfortable for you. They’ll likely be more than willing to accommodate your needs.

Halloween should be a time for everyone to feel safe, respected, and understood. Survivors can enjoy the holiday too, but they may need a little extra care and consideration. If you’re a Survivor, remember that setting boundaries and asking for understanding is okay; have that conversation with your children. And for those who want to support a Survivor, sensitivity can help make Halloween a more positive experience.

At Control Alt Delete, we recognize the courage and resilience it takes to navigate these challenges. With support and awareness, we can create an environment where Survivors feel safe to celebrate any occasion, including Halloween, on their terms.