“Make It Make Sense”: When Domestic Violence Agencies Defend Abusers
It’s the kind of headline you hope is fake: Domestic violence agencies advocating for the return of a known domestic violence abuser to the United States.
And yet—it’s real.
We are watching, in absolute shock and horror, as organizations who claim to believe Survivors and support Survivors suddenly pivot to defend a man known for harming them. These same agencies, whose missions are supposedly rooted in safety, healing, and justice, are now demanding that this abuser—deported after a documented history of violence—be welcomed back with open arms. And not just welcomed, but protected.
Make it make sense.
Because right now, it doesn’t.
These are the same organizations that post purple ribbons in October. That host candlelight vigils and say names of women lost to violence. That hand out brochures about the cycle of abuse. But when Survivors speak out, say, “That’s him. He hurt me,” these agencies turn around and say, “But he deserves justice too.”
Where was that energy when Survivors were being gaslit, silenced, and retraumatized? Where was the outcry when they needed protection—not just from their abuser, but from the systems that enabled him?
Let’s be very clear: Deportation is not the issue. Abuse is. This isn’t a conversation about borders. It’s a conversation about boundaries, about the ones that were violated again and again by this individual. And about how domestic violence agencies are now violating them too, by siding with the perpetrator over the people he harmed. Because it matches their political narrative.
Survivors are watching this. And they are devastated. Betrayed. Furious.
We are too.
We work every single day to earn the trust of Survivors. To create a world where they can come forward without fear, where their stories are heard, believed, and met with action. When agencies who are supposed to be allies instead protect abusers, that trust is shattered. And the consequences are real—people stay silent. People stay trapped. People die.
If you claim to support Survivors, your actions must reflect that—even when it’s inconvenient or doesn’t match your political beliefs. Even when the abuser is charismatic, well-connected, or “not who you expected.” Believing Survivors is not conditional. It’s not a PR slogan. It’s a commitment.
So again, we ask: Make it make sense.
And if you can’t?
Step aside. Survivors deserve better.
